Day 5

Jonathan's exact words were, "Why do you have this incessant addiction to hospitalization?"

This is a half-true statement.

False because addiction is a bit of an extreme word to use for having five illness in the last five months. Also false because hospitalization is inaccurate. Only two of these illnesses resulted in hospital visits (#1: the biopsy for a lump on my breast (though technically a breast center, not a hospital, but a rather large needle was used) and #2: an actual hospital).

True because I went to an actual hospital today. I got there in an actual ambulance with actual firemen (they were all male, I'm not being gender exclusive). I had an actual IV stuck in my arm.

But don't let these eloquent words fool you, it was not a glamorous experience.

Some of you may know that for the last few months I've been feeling a lot of fatigue. It has become frustrating because it keeps me from enjoying the outdoors and exercising as much. But more so it keeps me from seeing my friends as much because I'll have to cancel or leave a gathering early.

I had a huge debacle with health insurance last fall but am now (cross my fingers (which should be considered a faith statement since Jesus died on a cross)). So that's why I went to my doctor yesterday and told him about my fatigue. I also told him about some stomach pain that I've been having for several weeks now. It started out as what I thought was hunger pains but just kind of moved into pain.

We also talked about my lightheadedness that occured last Wednesday while walking on a treadmill for 20 minutes. And we talked about my headaches, my weight gain, my sensitivity to the cold, and more. This is when he told me to get my blood drawn to be tested. This is what led to this morning's episode.

So I went to Quest Diagnosis to have three vials of blood drawn for testing. As the tech prepared my arm and searched for a vein I told him, "I'm not very good at this." He asked if I wanted to lie down but I said, "No, I'm feeling like a fighter today." The next thing I remember is him asking if I was ok. In the 30 seconds meantime, I was unconscious and having a rather delightful dream.

Slightly groggy I watched as four firemen arrived and placed me on a stretcher. They asked me a few questions, took me down the elevator, and then placed me in the ambulance. They hooked me up to an IV, took my blood sugar level, then attached stickers that fed to a heart monitor. We then took off for Glendale Adventist Hospital.

When I arrived two nurses (who teased each other like sisters) worked on me, making sure I got some food. But before I ate they used the IV port to draw the blood that was the impetus for this epic day. They then did an EKG on me and I waited for some other test results to come back.

The nurse told me I had to give a urine sample so she sent me and my IV bag down the hall to the restroom. I'm not sure if you've ever had an IV in your arm (right at the inner bend of your elbow) but it's pretty fragile. Any movement, especially bending, causes the point of the needle to move--likely in a poking fashion. Attempting to go to the bathroom was a bit challenging. Just as I was about to sit on the toilet I noticed blood had started making its way out of my IV and up towards the bag. I became rather alarmed but since I'd made it that far in the urine sample process I decided to quickly finish and get to the nurse. When my flustered, bloodied-IV, self returned to her she shrugged and said, "That's gravity for you. Lay back down."

By 1pm my dear friend Jonathan Tarman had arrived and the doctor told me everything looked good, with three blood tests needing more time to process (thyroid, vitamin D, and something else I can't remember). They discharged me and I went home.

So here I am, sitting on my couch. I took a long nap this afternoon and have eaten some. It's fairly uneventful now, with the ambulance, hospital bed, and euphoric unconsciousness over. I'm left with a glass of water and some carrots.

I pray that soon the blood tests results come back so I can begin to feel better and put all of these "incessant addiction to the hospital" shenanigans behind me. My money's on the thyroid. If you'd like to get a pool together I'm sure we could racket a small amount. Though I don't have the energy to do it, so arrange it yourself.

Oddly enough, I'm in a very good mood (when I'm conscious) and at this exact moment munching on crisp, tasty carrots. I also watched one of my favorite shows, Jeopardy. Perhaps these small things are the opportunities in the crises (which is what today's Guidepost Daily Calendar told me to watch for). But now I'm just rambling and I'm impressed you've made it to the bottom. You must be a good friend and I am probably thinking about how grateful I am for you at this exact moment.

Until the next ambulance ride....or tomorrow....